I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you.

I looks like I didn't do it. I is convincing. But reallys, I prolly did it.

No other canines would dreamz of doing it but me. BUT, I playz it off well. They never suspects a thing.

Harry 6

Last night, my daughter D went to see Harry Potter and the half blood prince and princess with her new boyfriend, who isn't so new anymore, but whatever. Not to be outdone, I took M and E to see it at another, more affordable theater. With much better seating I might add. We got there at the perfect time, about 10 minutes before Harry and the indian blood oklahoma trail pauper started. I haven't followed the Potter saga well because I got on this kick where I thought it was evil, but now I'm off that kick and so to the theater we went. Now I will have to rent the other 5 movies so I know what the heck everything meant in the movie. The movie had been on for about ten minutes when this man says, out loud, "Turn it off." He was on the other side of the theater, but I'm pretty sure more than just the person he was talking to heard him.

My children didn't seem to be disturbed, until the guy said more loudly,"TURN IT OFF." Then the guy yelled, "TURN IT OFF!!!" At this point, about half the theater turns around. I never saw who was yelling, but I did see a guy get up and walk out of the theater. Which makes me think his cell phone rang and he actually answered it OR he was texting. Now, I have texted during a movie because no one can see the light from my screen like you can see the light from everyone else's phone because my phone is special because it is mine. However, I would never answer my phone during a movie. Okay, and I no longer text during movies because I would die from embarassment if some guy yelled at me DURING a movie like that. Egads!

The rest of the movie played without any further excitement, well, except for the excitement that WAS the movie of course. Because that was pretty darn exciting really. That's all I have to say about that.

I think I would like that in either chrome or titanium.

E has some scrappy teefers. He inherited his father's larger teeth (nothing wrong with that), but my small jaw. At the age of 8, his regular dentist kept giving us referrals to the orthodontist. I took note of that at the age of 9 and lo and behold, our insurance will pay for braces because his teefers are just jacked up.

Say hello to Brace Face.

He is being very bashful about the new metal mouth, and on the drive home from the orthodontist's office, he kicked the back of my seat (which brought me much joy, I love it when they kick the back of my seat while I'm driving [***grits teeth***]) and said, "I cannot wait to get these braces off." He then told me I just didn't understand. Of course, I then planted my foot firmly on his rear end and kicked it. No, of course I didn't do that, I was driving. But I did start a long and rambling monologue about my three years as a metal mouth. I got one sentence into my lengthy monologue, and was interrupted with an, "okay, okay, you get it, I get it, you get it," at which point I just continued my monologue cause last time I checked, I am the boss of him.

We go back next week for more brackets. His teefers were too jacked up to get all of the brackets on in the first visit. I haven't told him yet. And I plan to take a new route next week when we go so he won't suspect our destination until we are there.

Just now he discussed with me the potential for rust on the braces in his mouth. Oh the fun I will have with his braces..... I'm thinking up horror stories right now...

When I say goodbye to someone, I expect it to stick.

No, that is NOT a pear tree, it is a CHAIR tree. Duh.

Also, yes the grass is dead. Thanks for noticing. The back yard is way too big to water, so I didn't. So there.

Like rearranging chairs on the deck of the Titanic

I sometimes wonder if the lady in the office next door had any idea that I can hear every single word that comes out of her mouth, if she would talk so loud. I really didn't need to know her friend uses vaginal cream successfully.

So last night, I was showing my friend the landlady video, the one with Will Ferrell and Pearl, the landlord, wherein she proceeds to cuss him up one side and down the other, and although wildly inappropriate, I will always find it hilarious. Before we watched that video, a new video appeared.... Go watch it. Now.

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/6670edb858/match-com-jon-gosselin

I am not going to lie, I had no idea match.com allowed you to do commercials. I am totally signing back up yo.